grumpyc*nt.com :: life is one big disappointment

Grumpy Cunt of the Month Mar 2007 by Obnoxio The Clown at Fri 13 Apr 23:09

Post yer votes here, folks.

My money's on Dances with Chickens. :thumb

Comments 59

GCOTM Jan/Feb 07 -- Everyone's a winner! by Obnoxio The Clown at Sun 4 Mar 11:43

Yes, indeedy! Everyone who posts in this forum is a winner! From the jailbird Veccie drivers to the defenders of the piss-gargling fucktard, everyone here wins something, whether it be a custodial sentence or a pained expression when they realise they're being a cunt. :thumb

However, the winners of the GCOTM award for January and February 2007 are as follows:

The outright winner, by a cuntry mile, is fags and beer. Well done, you fucking mong! :point

Sharing the runner-up podium, we have Old Holborn and thedsm. I recommend that OH brings his own lube. :wink:

(And the Reverend Ian Paisley was nowhere, so perhaps not everyone's a winner :D )

Comments 0

Grumpy Cunt of the Month(s) Jan/Feb 2007 by Obnoxio The Clown at Fri 2 Mar 08:45

In a rousing tribute to the laziness of the moderators of GC, I've decided to fire up a belated, combined GC of the months January and February.

To start the ball rolling, I'm nominating a miserable fuckhead who has had me in stitches this year, stood his ground and chipped in with a commendable mixture of piss (!!) and vinegar, bile, spleen and acid:

Old Holborn! :bow

Comments 41

and the nominations for 2006 were .... by thedsm at Mon 11 Dec 23:10

Shall we have one?

Comments 39

GCOTM for July - Deadb0y by Deca at Sun 6 Aug 19:34

Ok so this is better late than never - depending on your point of view I guess. So stop scratching your arses or trying to look down BB's cleavage* and get nominating for who you think deserves the title of GCOTM. I'll give it a few days or so then tot up the votes as per these new fucking rules i've had to read about

:rolleyes

*Horri, of course, is excused from this particular one

Comments 22

June GrumpyCunt award. by Fuck Off at Fri 30 Jun 19:09

Anyone who can still stand after 100's of pages of vitriol and piss taking and then posts up some decent rants gets my vote.

[size=7]Old Felchborn[/size] :oops:

Comments 36

GCOTM for May: Johnny5 by MMFy at Wed 7 Jun 23:41

Well, no cunt even bothered with the nominations as far as I can see, so I am nominating and hereby awarding myself GCOTM for May in a Reverend-esque shameless display of what a complete cunt I am.

Let the abuse* commence.

*You can always nominate some other cunt if you want, but then I'll just have a tantrum... :confused

Comments 54

Grumpy Cunt Award for April by Horribilis XVI at Sun 30 Apr 23:30

Well cunters, the month is now just about over so it's time for you to place on record your vote for GCOTM.

There have been some terrific posts by new and old members alike. Kim and Old Holborn have both made excellent contributions whilst Zammo, Station Miek, Johnny 5 and even Obo have made some good efforts.

But what do YOU think....?

Comments 13

GCOTM March - Johnny 5 by Horribilis XVI at Mon 17 Apr 21:53

So the new and exciting method of voting has now been well and truly put to the test!

How fucking thrilling can it get!

Mr Off has bestowed upon me the honour of collecting, counting and verifying the votes cast, which as everyone knows, is now via a post vote, (as opposed to a php poll vote which we had found to be slightly Mugabefied).

So Ladeeeez, Gentlemen and fucking Van Owning Poofs, I can give you the final count for March:

VanManCunt - 1 vote*

Horri - 1 vote**

BadAcid - 1 vote

Bollockchops - 2 votes

Indigo - 2 votes

Rev "fucked off because the Ladyboys are calling" Paisley - 3 votes

Johnny5 - 8 votes

Congratulations J5 - well deserved and your third award I believe?! Seriously though, excellent work from The Robot and something to which all our n00bs cunts can aspire to (but never hope to reach) :D

*doesn't count. Welsh twat voted for himself.

**what a fucking pity I didn't make the post a few days before the end of the month :(

Comments 8

Grumpy cunt award for March by Fuck Off at Sun 2 Apr 21:05

I've just realised that as all of the moderators have been sacked, I'd better start the ball rolling.

Very difficult. Johnny 5, obo and the Rev have all put in some hilarious rants as have Horri and Indigo.
However for March I'm going with a relative newbie who is showing a lot of promise. I casting my vote for Bollockchops :thumb

Comments 39

Grumpy cunt of the month nominations. by Fuck Off at Sun 2 Apr 20:57

With the new protocol just post up who you think is the grumpiest cunt of the month.
Take in not just quantity of rants and posts, but the quality and structure of the moan.

Comments 0

GCOTM February 2006 - Arstornaway by Horribilis XVI at Wed 1 Mar 11:25

Well, the votes are counted, the Election Commission have carried out their investigation, made a number of recommendations and thanks to their input we will be introducing a new voting system for March and thereafter.

But let's for the moment congratulate probably the archetypal Grump, the most miserable, grumpy, pissed off fucker you could perhaps ever wish to meet ahead of you in the Post Office queue – Arsetonaway :bow

Well done Arsey for yet again providing us with a consistent flow of bile, hatred and miserableness that most of us can only aspire to. Here's hoping you give us all a few more months yet you old bastard - this place wouldn't be the same without you.

:cheers

Comments 30

New GCOTM election protocol by Fuck Off at Fri 24 Feb 21:24

To make the poll absolutely fair I have taken advice from the board's silk who has suggested that we should adopt a virtual verbal poll.

This would take the form as some of the nominations are now forwarded.

Example:

Fuck Off wrote:

QuoteMy vote goes to obo for his rant that all BMW drivers are absolute cunts, and that pork is on the up in Haifa

These personal nominations will be totted up by some cunt of a Mod or Admin, and declared at the end of each calendar month.

Wotcha think

Comments 14

GCOTM: February 2006 Nominations by Horribilis XVI at Mon 20 Feb 15:01

Nominations please, there's still a week or so to go, so plenty of time for Obo start posting something worthwhile :confused

I'll kick the ball off with Kim and Fucky.

Comments 19

Grumpy CUNT of the month October - thedsm by Deca at Tue 1 Nov 21:43

With 55% of the votes, this months winner is [color=red]thedsm[/color]. With his own particular brand of humour, witty and often cutting comments, he has proved incredibly popular with most grumpycunt members. Here are just a few of his posts

"The gobshite, the copper and the litterbin":
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=3221&highlight=

"Fucking Varifocals":
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=3137&highlight=

"Snot":
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=3248&highlight=

Not to mention his contribution to "Trick Treat or Torture", which had me absolutely crying with laughter :thumb

Congratulations to our Resident Queen, keep up the good work! :clap

Comments 5

Grumpy Cunt nominations for OCTOBER by Deca at Tue 25 Oct 13:58

As usual the limit is 10 nominations, first come first served and all that, so get nominating :thumb

Comments 20

Grumpy CUNT of the month September - Dances with Chickens by Deca at Fri 7 Oct 17:49

Although still a relative noob, DwC has stormed in with just the right attitude and some seriously good posts to take the title of "grumpy CUNT of the month"
Here are just a few of those posts:

Racist? Not me mate
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=3087&highlight=[/url]
Fuel Protests
[url]http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=2941&highlight=[/url]
Fucking Kids
[url]http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=2918&highlight=

Congratulations, you fucking cunt! :thumb

Comments 10

September has come by thedsm at Sat 1 Oct 10:00

... and September has gone, and we never got to vote.
And thanks to that Turkish cunt, we now appear to have lost the thread!

Comments 14

Grumpy CUNT of the month - August - Noxie by Deca at Sat 3 Sep 16:02

With 63% of the votes, Noxie came steaming out in front (ooer) with thanks to his spirited tackling of the multitude of Trolls that have found their way here, and such posts as:
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=2811&highlight=]Ding-Dong[/url],
[url=http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=2822&highlight=]A funeral for William Wallace[/url],
[url=http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=2886&highlight=]Can you just take care of this please[/url]
And my own personal favourite:
[url=http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=2820&highlight=

So Noxie, here's to you :cheers

Comments 10

Grumpy Cunt nominations for AUGUST by Deca at Mon 1 Aug 16:08

Yes yes before I get nagged I know we are only just in August, the topic is here for when you see a grump and you want to nominate the writer.
:thumb

Comments 24

Grumpy Cunt of the Month for July - Gladstone Screwer by Deca at Sun 31 Jul 23:15

With 40% of the votes Good old Gladders romps home in first place. Despite the ladies "rolling up, opening their sweaty legs and pleading to take the screwer sperm free shag challenge" (BikerBitch©)he has still found the time to spit out threads such as http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=2539&highlight=]Private Number Calling[/url], [url=http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=2532&highlight=]Fucked in the arse by a sweaty Mick called Mike[/url], and deserved a mention for his cracking one liner in GrumpyBitch's [url=http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=45307&highlight=#45307

Keep up the good work :thumb

Comments 0

Grumpy CUNT of the month: 11.06.05 - The Rev by Deca at Sat 11 Jun 15:40

This months winner - and first time DOUBLE winner is our very own man of the cloth, The Rev, with such posts as http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=2291&highlight=]St Alfreds Parish Newsletter[/url], [url=http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=2274&highlight=]Bad Week, coming back later absolutely wankered[/url] and [url=http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=2086&highlight=,he has proved his worth time and time again over his 1031 posts (to date!)

We salute you oh revered one :bow

Nominations for next week in the appropriate thread please :thumb

Comments 3

Grumpy Cunt Of The Month - Nominations For 11/07/05 by Deca at Sat 11 Jun 15:40

Might be a bit soon, but the thread's here for if anyone wants to nominate on basis of just one good rant :evil:

Comments 28

Grumpy Cunt Of The Month - Nominations For 11/06/05 by Gemini-Phoenix at Sat 14 May 16:40

Better get the ball rolling for Deca again then. Shove some nominations this way, and when she returns she can then put them in some sort of posh order so that we can have a civilized sort of referendum about it. Or something.

So, nominations please for next month's GCOTM - 11th June 2005

Comments 29

Grumpy CUNT of the Month 11/05/05 : Bikerbitch by Gemini-Phoenix at Sat 14 May 16:33

Without a doubt, Bikerbitch is this month's Grumpiest Cunt! (Or should that be Cuntess???)

Not only has she entertained us with her skills of cuntishness throughout, she has also given us these little gems:

British Gas Business
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1858

British Gas Revisited......
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1894

For Fucks Sake - is everyone happy today or something??
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1890

Comments 11

Grumpy CUNT of the Month 11/04/05 : Creamtax by Deca at Mon 11 Apr 22:44

This months winner comes as no surprise seeing as pretty much everyone said they were going to vote for Creamy anyway :nana

Even though it was expected it was also thoroughly deserved with such posts as:

Colleagues with no social skills/Women in the workplace
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1661

Taxi Drivers
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1072

Pete Doherty, Kate Moss and the Hypocrisy of the press
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1240

Congrats you Grumpy Cunt you :thumb

(Nominations for the coming month please)

Comments 53

Grumpy CUNT of the week 18/02/05 : The Rev by Deca at Fri 18 Feb 21:57

This weeks grumpy cunt is my own personal favourite, The Rev. You have to love a person who likes small children so much and who spends so much time in his confessional - even if nobody is ever willing to discuss what goes on in there :P

He has brought us the following revered posts:

Rip Off Website:
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1359

The royal British Legion
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1344

Please Remove the Teenager Thread - some of his posts in this one were pretty good:
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1326

We salute you, oh toucher of the cloth! :bow

Comments 27

Grumpy CUNT of the week 04/02/05 : Johnny5 by Deca at Fri 4 Feb 20:47

This weeks grumpy cunt is Johnny5, keeping us entertained with his own personal brand of invective and sparing but excellent use of his modding skills

he has brought to us the following superb posts:

Ging-ers
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1031

Horse Riding Scum
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1210

Ugly People
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=1247

Comments 11

Grumpy CUNT of the week 19/12/04 : HappyBeaver by Deca at Sun 19 Dec 13:11

This weeks grumpy cuntess is HappyBeaver, entertaining us all with her views on old people and the postal system to name a couple

Shes brought us the following posts:

Terminally Ill Persons
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=671

PostOffice Delivery Crap
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=679

My new rims...stick with me....its cuntish!!
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=670

Truly a grumpy cunt!

Comments 19

Grumpy CUNT of the week 12/12/04 : TIED! by Deca at Mon 13 Dec 12:17

this weeks grumpy CUNTS are arsetornaway and GC, suffering from senility and apathy respectively we have had the following posts:

arsetornaway
Blind Pew
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=441

the 50p cheque
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=531

GC
Big Issue Sellers
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=616

My Title
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=568

Comments 0

Grumpy CUNT of the week 15/11/04 : Deca by Davey at Mon 22 Nov 21:02

This weeks grumpy Cuntess is "Deca", suffering from extreme PMT she has brought us the following great posts:

How old do you have to be to qualify as a chav?http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=4781

pointless moaning
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=276

money grabbing people who sue over fuck all etc
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=300

Comments 8

Grumpy Cunt of the Week 08/11/04 : Karma Supra by Davey at Fri 12 Nov 01:16

As by popular demand this weeks grumpy cunt is Karma Supra, he has entertained us all with his extreme views on Wales and Imigrants.

A selection of posts:

English mother fucker, Do you speak it?:
http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=163

Should I run for priminister?:http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=1162

I have been away:http://www.grumpycunt.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=965

he truely is a bitter bastard!

Comments 5

Poster	Posts
Obnoxio The Clown	11232
Fuck Off	8388
johnny5	7531
arsetornaway	6613
MMFy	6516
Bearded Clam	5375
thedsm	5337
Creamtax	4648
Horribilis XVI	4122
Gemini-Phoenix	2600
Pneawf	2515
Station	2150
Reverend Ian Paisley	2116
Gladstone Screwer	2105
Davey	1874
CJ	1841
S B	1728
deadb0y	1678
badacid	1654
Dances with Chickens	1627
Window Licker	1561